I wrote this a few weeks ago after a rough day with our little man.
As a breastfeeding mom I am constantly on demand for my son. It was something I knew about when I decided to breastfeed, but knowing about something and living it are two different things. Infants feed at least every 3 hours, and sometimes less. That time frame begins at the start of the feeding, so if feeding takes a half hour, then you are left with 2 1/2 hours before feeding might start again, and sometimes less. So far I haven’t minded the night time feedings because he is such a good boy, and I haven’t even minded the feedings every 3 hours, but the other day Christian decided he was extremely hungry, and the two of us had our first REALLY bad day.
The Captain and I brought our little guy to our friends house for New Years Eve, and although we had a good time, it really threw off my schedule to be out so late. As a matter of fact I found myself even more tired the next day when Christian was a little fussy and didn’t want to sleep. At this point I found myself becoming a little testy. It’s funny how that can happen with the lack of sleep huh? Then came the next day, when we had plans to go to my in laws in the afternoon.
The day started like any other, but quickly took a turn for the worse. I woke up and fed him like I always do….then one hour later it seemed that our little man was hungry again. So I shrugged and fed him. I guess he was just hungry? Normally after a feeding he is happy and content. But not this day. Right after feeding he started to fuss, and this fussing did not stop. I would change and walk, and still nothing would make him feel better. Then one hour right on the nose after the start of the last feeding….he screamed again for more. So I fed. I fed all day long, and in between I walked, and he cried.
I was just so tired at this point! Finally, the afternoon arrived and he finally fell asleep. The only way I could get him to sleep was to have him lay on my chest, and in this position I finally got a bit of a nap. It was bitter sweet because I knew we had to be going out, and although I had no desire to go, I knew the family was looking forward to seeing the baby. When little Christian decided it was time to wake up, he also told me it was time to eat again. How could this be? So I fed him….and I cried.
Why did I cry? No idea? Could I not handle a fussy baby? I mean come on Jen! He’s such a good boy, and babies cry. Suck it up! But cry I did. The Captain looked at me and asked what was wrong. All I could say was that I didn’t know…that it was just a bad day. He did the right thing and let me alone because there was really nothing he could say to help. He did the next best thing and took the baby while I showered. It helped to get clean and step away from the situation. One thing about being a nursing mom is that all the responsibility to feed is on me.
We went to my in laws and he was a good boy of course. It felt good to be able to hand him off to others for a little while. But the long day still wore on me.
After speaking to others I found out that a growth spurt is a natural thing and is probably the cause of the cluster feeds. Cluster feeding is when I baby wants to constantly eat. That is certainly what my little boy did that day. A growth spurt huh?
I am lucky, and our boy normally is such a good baby. I know others will read this and say…one day?? Try having a fussy baby for months! And I give those mothers a ton of credit. I take my hat off to you! For me? I just wanted to share about that day…that hard day…because so far as I read back my posts it looks like
This made me cry. I think most moms have been there and will feel what you what you just wrote.
You give yourself some credit too! You got through the day ?
I just wanted to share so that hopefully other women will read and if they’ve gone through it will know that time will pass… ? yes I did make it through the day! Phew!
I know how you feel. My daughter was like that every day for the first 3 months and then for an additional month she had 3 or 4 bad days per week. It does get so overwhelming and I did plenty of crying myself, but it goes away and gets better. So if it happens again just remember that you are a strong woman and will look back and be proud of being a great mom who made it through!
I can’t even imagine. I guess I am blessed that the bad days are few and far between, but when I have them its hard. But tis the nature of being a mom right?
I think it is great that you share these bits of your life with us. Women need to stick together and share the wealth of information we gain through our everyday dealings in life ?
Oh, how I truly remember those days… and my youngest is now 18! I had six, all breastfed, 4 boys, 2 girls, and I remember so well those days of “growth spurts”…so they are called cluster feeds now! No matter, the do come, and are just as difficult as having a baby who cries for days (daughter…number 5 baby…suffered from colic (had she been baby #1, she would have been an ONLY child!). You did well, and survived. They will come again…and do just as you did. Hooray for you! Hang in there!
So the memory doesn’t fade huh? lol Thanks for the encouraging words!
Jen –
Thank you for sharing. I’ve actually been following along with your blog for a while. I just found out I was pregnant last tuesday (I’m only 5 weeks along and I know I have a very long road ahead of me)but I am looking forward to going back through your archives. You shared so much, and I know it will be helpful to read your experiences now that I’m about to go through such a humongous change. I tried posting a bit on thebump.com, but some of those moms to be are MEAN! Anyway, just thought I send a quick hello and thank you! I’m sorry you had that bad day ?
Congratulations! How exciting!!! If you ever want to chat about anything please feel free to write me! Yes I have heard that sometimes women on forum boards can be rough. I’m always up for a chat! ?
Kudos for sticking through it and it’s the bad days that make you stronger. Olivia cried and cluster fed for 4 months straight lol so I’ve been there ?
I can’t even imagine what you went through. I am lucky the rough days are few and far between. But you made it through and you have a wonderful little girl! That’s what counts right?
Good for you for making it through a rough day! It’s hard, but at least now your prepared for the next one! ?
There were days (with both kids) where I felt like all I was doing was nursing them.