I have this fear in my gut every day. Most of the time it’s hidden behind pure joy, but sometimes, when I see a TV show, or hear a story about someone else, that fear rears it’s ugly head. It’s a fear that something bad will happen to someone in my family. Although it always has scared me, it’s never felt like this. Now, if I see or hear about something bad happening to a child I want to throw up. What if that horrid thing happened to my son? I know you can’t live life that way, but I have a feeling we all have those fears. How do you control it?
I was reading a blog post written about a little girl who was one year, one month and one day old, the same age as my son, who was ran over by a car at a little league game. I cried. I didn’t know this little girl, but I cried. That poor family woke up that day all happy that they were going to a little league game. Never could they imagine how horribly it would end.
We wake up every day not knowing what will happen. Normally, that is the joy of life. Feeling the anticipation of each new day. What can we expect? But now that I’m a mom, and my heart walks around every day embodied as my son, I am having a hard time.
I can’t exactly remember when this fear started. If I hear a story about any accident, or illness I can only think about how I couldn’t imagine what I would do if that happened to my son.
I know this isn’t healthy. I promise you that I am not paralyzed by fear each day, but I wanted to share my fears with you. How do I be strong?
Is this fear normal?
I think this is more than most definitely normal. So long as it doesn’t take over your life!!
I worry about this too… not badly, but I do give thought to things if Ollie is away with someone else I will wonder are they holding his hand properly to cross the road…. have they put his carseat straps tight enough…… the list is and always has been endless.
You wouldnt be a good mum if you didn’t have those fears!
It certainly doesn’t over take my life..and most of the time sits on the back burner until I hear or see something…then it gets stuck in my head and my heart hurts. I hear ya about worrying when I give him to someone else..its rough!!
i feel like we could all go there pretty quickly. i know i do on occasion. but as i was reading your post, a verse came to mind, “perfect love drives out all fear.” there are definite threats in this world and you know enough about the bible to know that just as jesus loves us perfectly, satan hates us with the same passion and wants nothing more than for us to be consumed and paralyzed by fear. so – my response is the only thing i know to do. pray that God, who “knows the end from the beginning” will guard and protect my family and give me the strength to deal with whatever he allows to come our way.
You are so very right! I struggle with that a lot, but I can see how turning to faith could help in this situation. I think it’s something I need to work on…thank you. A lot of this rings true to me.
Yes, remember it’s in God’s hands. It’s tough, I worry a lot, because of my mom. My bf tells me I always take things so negatively. Be glad and really live each day like it was the last.
This is so completely normal, as a mom, but as others have pointed out, you can’t live there!
Becoming a parent made me realize how much God loves *me*… His child. (Can you imagine the agony we must cause Him when we put ourselves in situations that are “unsafe” spiritually, or make choices that are not His best for us?) Then, I thought about my own children…He loves them even *more* than *I* can. (How’s that for a startling thought, when you know how deeply you love your kids!)? So…when my boys started delivering papers at age 9 & 10 and had to bike to their route…they’d leave the house, and I’d pray, “God, You know I can’t watch them, and I know you love them even more than I do…you just have to watch over them, keep them safe- because I *can’t*!!” Now they are teens and I pray that more than ever…
Blessings, Kristy