As I look around our living area I am engulfed by all of my sons toys. There isn’t much space in this house that isn’t taken over by him, and as I look at everything it feels like it has always been this way. Some days I feel so lost and unsure of how to be a good mom, but most days we go through our routine like me and him have been living it forever. I can’t believe that my son is almost 2 years old. I can’t believe my little boy has been in our lives for only two years, but in all honestly it feels like he has been with us a lifetime.
It’s hard to picture my life with out my son. The other day I was home alone and I was lost because there aren’t many times that happens. I sat on the couch and thought about how I spent my days before he was here and I honestly couldn’t tell you what I did. Yes I worked, and yes I had an amazing life, but looking back I wonder how I passed the time. Almost every waking minute of my day is spent with my son, almost every day of the year. That’s a lot of time spent with someone.
Now, almost two years later it’s crazy to think of a different life. It’s crazy to imagine that I ever had free use of our television. Did I really get to watch what I wanted to watch BEFORE 7:30 pm? Did I really get to just run to the store when I forgot something without having to tote around a toddler, or go to a bank or an appointment and not have to apologize when he runs around inappropriately? Did The Captain and I really get to do whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted in our home? Did we go out to dinner with out making sure we had someone to watch our little man? Did that life really happen? Sometimes, I think NO….
It’s hard to describe the joy I feel at night and on weekends when I have my whole little family together playing. Together we laugh and play and enjoy each other so much. In just under two years our son has brought us more joy then anything else I can imagine. How can such a little person change your life in so many ways? It happens the instant they are born, if not the moment you find out they were conceived.
As we come to the end of his second year I can only imagine what is in store for us. I guess he will continue to take over our entire house, and my BC (before Christian) life will seem even more distant. I shouldn’t even try to wrap my head around how quickly time flies because when I do that my son has already graduated high school and is leaving me for college. That will never happen right?
As quick as these past (almost) two years seem, it also seems like forever. One little person can be so amazing, fantastic, hilarious, maddening, frustrating, loveable, exhausting……the list goes on and on. He is so many things to me, and that my friends is what makes life of a mom grand. Each day, and each year I get to see the world through his eyes, and it truly is special.
Here’s to finishing out our second year strong. Bring on the fall!