Throughout this pregnancy I have been a bit cautious. Especially since I know what it’s like to suffer a miscarriage, I think that somewhat put a damper on my excitement, and willingness to plan for this baby. Once I made it through the first trimester I allowed myself to breath a little more, but in the back of my mind I knew that I was waiting for that Level 2 sonogram that we had yesterday to fully allow myself to plan for this baby. I didn’t think about the nursery, I haven’t really thought too much about names, and I haven’t bought one item myself for little Pooh Bear. That is an amazing feat since I am a super huge planner, and always over think things. And now that we had that sonogram…and know that little Pooh Bear is a boy it’s time for my brain to go into full overdrive. It’s time to start breaking out the plans!
First thing is to steer my brain from thinking pink to thinking blue! I have so many questions! This little boy will be the first grandson and first nephew on both sides. What does that mean? I have ZERO idea how to plan for a baby! I may be naive, but I am a big believer that planning for a baby is something I need to figure out for myself, because what worked for my parents, or my friends may not work for me. So I have to decide for myself what I want and what I don’t. That being said it’s time for me to start the research!
One item that I am truly finding helpful is this Baby Bargains Book. Basically, the book has done a ton of research and polled tons of mothers and have rated and given advice on most of the necessary baby products from cribs to monitors. I feel like I am going to look to this book as my bible to registering. They let you know what’s worth spending extra money on and what’s not. This is very helpful considering when it comes to babies everyone is always trying to sell you something…especially when it comes to safety. And being a first time mom it’s hard to sort through what really IS important and what is just overdoing it. The Captain laughs at me, because he hasn’t yet figured out where my line is when it comes to the baby products. For example, I don’t want to put baby bumpers in my crib…but I find the wiper warmer contraption extremely silly. My answer to him is that I still have no idea where my line is…I’m still figuring that all out! I really want to try my best not to be a complete neurotic. That may be hard since it’s in my nature…but I promise I’m going to try.
Diapers? Well I went back and forth with the idea of cloth diapering for some time. I REALLY wanted to cloth diaper for purposes of saving money, but after doing some research I don’t really think the savings will be that much. Plus, I feel like I will have so much to deal with that I don’t think I will stick with it. I have decided to focus my attentions on my desire to breast feed. This is Really important to me, so I figure my time doing that will be better than that time spent doing laundry.
Cribs? wowza! Where to begin? Did you know you have to buy your crib mattress separetly? Drop side cribs are now a no no….watch out and make sure you get the right sheets….don’t use bumpers or the quilts that come in the sets…yikes!
So yes, my brain is on complete overdrive right now. I enjoy it. I find researching this stuff fun. I also am happy that the decisions I make will be based on what I’ve read, not only because my friend did it. So get ready for some posts about registry choices. it seems that each of these things will require a nice thought out post to get all my thoughts put together. Trust me it’s theraputic! So let the fun begin! It’s time to start thinking of this baby as a real being and not just an idea…soon enough he will be needing it all!
Wow, I can totally feel the pressure! You’re building up to this big date when you get to meet the little one and you need to have everything ready. But you are so smart to do your research – whatever you decide will be right because it’s your baby. It’s all gonna be great!
Ya it’s some pressure..I just have to take it one thing at a time I think. I still do have 5 months! lol
It is sooooo much easier the second time around lol. First time we got everything under the sun. Even stuff I knew I didnt need I ended up with ‘just in case’. It is a fun and crazy time.
This time? cloth diapers (spent about $300, adds up to an extra load of wash every other day or two), new crib sheets(though we co-sleep & room share so the crib hasnt gotten much use yet), play yard with bassinet/changing table, got a swing as a gift that I have since passed down to my sister cause the baby is too big for it…breast pump,couple of bottles, ErgoBaby carrier, Maya Wrap, onesies, couple of cute outfits, sleepers, random other clothing…and that was it.
I think the first time is supposed to be a ton of fun registering for stuff, decorating the nursery, planning :D- so enjoy it!
On cloth diapering- I didnt cloth diaper the first month-too much going on. I dont do it because of the money savings. Though we havent purchased a box of diapers or wipes in nearly two months.
I do it because a lot of the chemicals that are in disposables arent allowed in adult products but are okay for babies and that makes no sense to me. Also the idea of plastic being against my kids’ most intimate parts bothers me.
You have posted regularly about the changes you are making and hope to make regarding your choices in food and so forth. Cloth diapering is right in line with that.
You’ve made your decision but if you find yourself considering cloth down the line after the baby is here please do not hesitate to talk to me about it ?
I bet it’s easier the 2nd time around! You know so much more and already have stuff.
I understand the benefits of cloth diapers..I’m just not sure it’s for me. I wanted it to be…but now I’m just not sure. I guess we’ll see what happens.
LOL! We’re cloth diapering. Up front the cost is crazy, but the fact that we wont have to keep going and purchasing diapers weekly throughout the first few months through potty training is where the savings come in. Plus for additional kids, you wont have to spend a dime. We’ve got about 25 one size diapers so far. And we do a lot a laundry between the two of us because of DH’s job (he’s a firefighter and is always washing uniforms), so an extra load every few days wont be strange for us. Honestly, everything seems to be the same minus the last step (cleaning).
Cribs – check out any local store you have – not the big chain stores. You can find a great deal there and the store we used didn’t even sell drop side cribs.
Honestly a lot of the stuff (probably more than half) out there for babies isn’t necessary or will be used once they’re 6 months or older, which is probably why I’m not to stressed about that and moreso with finding daycares and pediatricians.
The books Consumer Reports has are good to check out as well. They come out with a new edition each year.
Ya i have heard that about being good in cost after the upfront cost, but I have read alot that with the cost of extra wash, and even the wash of the clothes that the diapers leak to make it close to the same. We have very high energy prices in LI so it makes me wonder if running the washer and dryer extra times is worth it?
As for cribs we have a great local store that we are considering. I hope it pans out.
I have heard most is unnecessary. I am hoping to week through it all and figure it out!
Re: Leaks
I have had more leaks, blowouts and issues with disposables than cloth diapers. When prepped and used correctly there are no reason for leaks. Though they do happen with any type of diapering system I have found with cloth diapers they happen less. Of course with a newborn I have to admit the EBF blowouts were bad with nearly everything we used.
I do have to change the baby more often because sposies hold more liquid but there goes yet another reason why I cd- I do not want my baby sitting in urine for longer than he has to. Also I am the one doing most of the caring of the baby in terms of diapering because Matt will not deal with cloth diapers. Though in the grand scheme of things he wasnt really changing all that many diapers anyway.
Leah was using the potty by 16 months and I credit cding (they feel wet sooner and learn to know when they have to go faster) and ECing (elimination communication) with her early potty training. Though honestly there wasn’t much training involved. She knew when she had to go, we were comfortable with bodily fluids and dealing with them so it wasn’t a strange introduction mixed with anxiety once she started to use the toilet.
Re: Energy Costs
I checked our electric and water bills for the past 6 months (Matt had the same concerns about energy costs). I see no big difference in terms of what we use. I guess I wash so much clothing to begin with that the added loads haven’t made much difference. Or maybe having a baby means shorter showers! haha
We have a HE washer and even with the extra two cycles (prewash, wash & extra rinse-which I do only cause we have allergy issues) there isn’t much difference in how much energy we use.
Where I did run into problems is with the dryer. Some AIOs (All In One) diapers take forever to dry so I just through them in there for one cycle and hang dry on a rack. I think if I dried them completely all the time I would see a change in the electric bill. My daytime, old school method with prefolds with snappi & fitted diapers dry without any problems and the covers are a cinch.
Re: Cost
The upfront costs can be a lot-especially if you choose to do AIOs for all changes. I don’t so I didn’t have that much of an upfront cost.
One of the reasons I love cding so much is cause the cloth diapers are so darn cute. With a boy it isn’t so easy to accessorize as it was with a girl. I find that it is easy to buy more than is needed because of the cuteness factor so I try to only get what we need. I have to curb spending or else I’d end up with way more diapers than I need for the baby.
My rule of thumb for parents who show an interest in cloth diapering is simple- “You never know until you give it a try.”
Before becoming a parent I would never have thought that I would the type of parent I am today. I swore my kids would sleep in their own cribs from day one, in their own rooms. I would’t be super attached (for some reason I thought I’d have a scheduled baby!), had zero issues with formula and disposable diapers. Since having Leah and now Louis I find myself caring more about things I only slightly cared about before. Like the environment and nutrition, and how chemicals like BPAs affect us. Adding two children to the world, to share and use up more of the world’s resources has made me more conscious of the choices we make as a family.
I don’t know how I got to where I am but I know part of getting there was ignoring what everyone else had to say about my choices. Never in my wildest dreams did I think I could ever have more in common with a Crunchy Mama than a Modern Mainstream Mom.
Now I am starting on a path to start my own cloth diapering, babywearing, breastfeeding, AP business. Insanity ?
My point is trust YOUR instincts. Do what you (and of course hubby) feel is best. Research and planning are a good way to start but in the end trust your gut. There is that Yiddish proverb that I always remember when I think about parenting “Mann traoch, Gott lauch” -“We plan, God laughs”.
That book was SO helpful for us! I linked to a blogger who did an AMAZING post about cloth diapering. She links to tons of different resources who research the actual costs and benefits. If interested, just search my blog for “cloth diaper” and I link to her post. She’s a huge researcher (very Type A) and I found it useful when deciding what we were doing. (For the record, I’m not totally all crazy about cloth diapering – we’re going to give it a go but if it doesn’t work for us, so be it!)
I’ll check out the blogger! So you are giving cloth a try? That’s great! Let me know how it goes! ?
I can totally relate!! I havent even allowed myself to be excited about this pregnancy; I have been so overcome with fear. Now that I know I have a little girl on the way (and everything is very healthy so far) its like I flicked a switch!! Im starting to plan the nursery and looking at baby girl clothes like crazy. My dad even bought me her coming home outfit today. I swear, this little girl is going to make me broke before she even gets here LOL
Good luck and happy planning!! Its so much fun now that we know what we are having right??
Can you believe I haven’t bought one thing myself? It’s crazy. I think if I were having a girl I’d be going nuts too. I love little man outfits for boys but they come into play when they are a little older! lol but I can’t wait to start doing everything!
You know, we have actually had a wipes warmer for both of our kids! Lol! It started out as kind of a joke gift from a young friend who said he didn’t know what to get (he did include a packbof diapers!) but you know, they’re kind of nice- especially in winter and it made me feel better on that sensitive skin. Now in no way shape or form am I calling them a necessity, but they are relatively inexpensive and my husband insisted on one for our daughter!
So onto something actually practical, lol. I wasn’t able to breastfeed my first, my son, who was a preemie. However, in retrospect I think it could have been done. My advice would be to have a lactation consultant contact available. Some hospitals have one available to you, you can go through LLL, etc. So so helpful. Luckily my second time was super easy (in fact took until 15 months to get her completely weaned!) so there’s no way to know how it will go. But, the more info you have going in, the better your chances. Oh and check out kellymom.com. Best resource ever, and I can tell you I’m far from what’s considered a crunchy type mom (not knocking, just wanting you to know no matter where you stand, this is the resource!)
I have never cloth diapered, but really out of the lack of desire. Some swear by it but it wasn’t for me.
Whatever happens, try to remember that you are doing the best you can. I have friends who ask for advice and I always say to research and have a plan for what you want to do but be prepared that all might not go according to plan- and that’s ok too. No one ever has it all figured out.
You will be an amazing mom, that is clear from your posts! I figure any mom or mom to be that spends her time frantic over all the details (not that I did that.. ahem..) already cares and loves that baby so much. All else will fall into place!
Thank you so much for your well thought out comment. I really appreciate it. The diaper warmer thing is funny…i just remember seeing my friend getting it and htinking how silly! lol
As for breast feeding I am determined to do as much as I can to make it work. I am well aware that it sometimes doesn’t, but I really want to give it my best effort. I am hoping this little one and my body cooperates. But I am fully prepared to use any resource I can to make that happen.
I have also heard about things not working out like planned. Being a huge planner this may be difficult, but I am doing my best to go into this knowing that I may have to change my own thinking based on what our Pooh Bear decides…go with the flow…lol remind me of htat later!!!
NOw, that I am home, I am trying to catch up on your blog:)
You will learn as you go and you really won’t know what works for you until you do it. If you research or not you will learn what things are best for you as you use them.
We will see how funny the wipe warmer is when your baby cries everytime you put a cold wipe on them when you change their diaper especially during the cold winter months! It really is inexspensive and a place that keeps the wipes moist as well. To me it’s the simple things that make diaper changing more comfortable for Lucas. But like you said everyone has different ideas about doing things and you will learn what works best for you as you go. I am learning something new each day. It is an endless journey!! A journey you will LOVE:)
Loved reading the comments about the cloth diapering. We plan on doing it. We went back and forth with it, but one of the things that put me over the edge was finding out that you have to clean out the #2 from disposables before throwing them out. (I think it even says it on some diaper packages.) Otherwise it gets in the public water system. So, if I am already going to clean the disposable diaper out, I might as well do cloth. They have a thing that hooks up to the back of your toilet that you can use to spray the diaper clean before putting it on the laundry bag. Cloth diapering is so much easier than it used to be. Even the diapers themself are just as easy to use as disposable. And you can buy one size so the price is not bad. Certainly a whole lot less than buying disposable. You use them from infant to potty trained. The only way the money would even come close is if you are using a service every week.
Plus there are all the awful chemicals in the diapers. I am planning on only feeding my baby organic food and using a chemical free bottle…but I am going to put dangerous chemicals against my baby’s skin? It just didn’t fit with my beliefs.
I always go on and on about the ridiculous stuff filling our landfills, so I felt like I would personally be a hypocrite if we didn’t do cloth.
I will admit it grosses me out. I am not looking forward to it. But, I know we have to do it. And I think in the long run I will be happy I put the effort in.