I’m not sure why, but for the past few days I have been extremely emotional. I have cried very easily, and just feel cranky. Maybe it’s because I haven’t slept well in a few days, maybe it’s because I’m pregnant and my hormones are all over the place, or maybe I’m just emotional. It’s not a sad type of emotional, it seems to be more of an overwhelmed emotional. I have so much running through my head at all times. As a matter of fact the problem has always existed (check out my post about becoming neurotic), I have always worried about a lot of things at once. It seems that I have kept all of my thoughts at bay until now. I kept them in the back of my head till we found out that we were having a little boy, and now that I am free to plan….it all comes pouring out. These are the times that I miss my martoonies….
I find that I am worrying about things that I have no business worrying about right now. Things like…will friends and family respect my wishes when it comes to this baby, what if I am tired in the hospital and want to limit my visitors but no one seems to care? What if Captain Awesome and I disagree on some major aspects regarding this baby…how do you deal with that? All of these things terrify me, and they aren’t something to worry about at least for another 5 months! But guess who is worrying now…me!
Another thing? I hate advice unless I ask for it. I think it’s just in my nature. That’s probably why I have never been able to work in an office type atmosphere. It drives me nuts when someone tries to tell me how to do things. But I am fully aware that when it comes to babies, everyone takes it as open season to put their two cents in. How will I deal with that? Why can’t advice only come when asked for? Yup another thing I worry about….
So as you can see I’m still pretty emotional. Lots to think and worry about. For some it may sound silly, but it is what it is. I’m looking forward to this weekend to hopefully relax and calm my head a bit…maybe it will shut itself down soon?? Maybe??
I think its nature…you are gonna be a full fledged mama, the worrying is forever! *hugs*
I’m sorry if I have overstepped any boundaries and offered unsolicited advice. I try not to. I too am irritated by the latter.
yes I think I will be worrying forever..lol I think it’s genetic!
No..you don’t overstep ?
I have a feeling I’ll be the exact same way when pregnant – worrying about everything at once. You’ll get through it!
Ooh, the advice is the worst. (I laugh at the irony considering my reply to you yesterday!)Everyone, from family to inlaws to friends to the lady at the grocery store has opinions. I have found the easiest way to handle it all is by focusing on the team that my husband and I are together. We make the decisions, and tough what anyone else thinks. I think we have had less aversion with that approach than other family members who try to please everyone!
I so relate to being neurotic. I still am, but luckily, my kids keep me so busy I can’t always focus on it ?
Your reply yesterday was great! I reached out on my blog to discuss something. That’s totally different then…”hey your having a kid? Let me tell you how I did things and you should too!” lol even before I asked.
Yes, I have to remember to stand firm w/ The Captain. I’m not the biggest people pleaser, so I guess that will help. Plus I have a big mouth lol
There’s so much to think about, worry about, etc. that it is exhausting and overwhelming and exciting all at once. I was getting annoyed with receiving advice from two people in particular, so I finally said “I know you are so knowledgeable about X subject, but I kind of want to look into things on my own. Thanks so much for your words and if I have questions afterwards, you are my go-to person.” Both people backed off. But then there are other people who continue to offer advice – I, too, found it so annoying. But then I started to realize that some of the advice was really good – and I started taking some of it. So maybe you’ll find that not all advice giving is a bad thing??
I like that reply! lol Because you said it exactly…I really want to try to find what works for ME. But if what I think will work does not, then I will be sure to ask for help…
I’m sorry you’re worrying so much, Jen :(. I guess it must come with the baby territory – I hope you’re able to find comfort soon.
About unsolicited advice – I am so guilty of giving mine out all the time. It’s a bad habit of mine, but it comes from a good place. I just can’t stand seeing people upset,sad and/or suffering so I try to give advice about my expriences or what not….With that said, hang in there! (my unsolicited advice for the day) ?
It’s not silly to have the feelings that you have and to be worrying about things. This is one of the most monumental and incredible experiences you’ll have in your life! And however you’re feeling is 100% right, because you’re in charge of your emotions (Did I just sound like Dr. Phil?!?)
You (like myself) are a planner…which adds to the stress and worrying because you are more aware of everything there is to think about. My best advice (and I know you don’t like advice but I’m hoping you don’t mind this bit) is to find a way to let go even if it’s just for a few minutes a day. Yoga worked wonders for me…and it was something I was able to do through almost all of my pregnancy. It was my 40 minutes a day to stop worrying about the color of the walls in the nursery, or if I should test for Down Syndrome, or whether I should have slept on my side last night instead of my back. If you can, find something that lets you just take a break and regroup. Besides…all the worrying and the planning will still be there when you’re done :0)
remember, people may give advice, but it doesnt mean you have to take it (or listen for that matter). you are the parent of this child, not anyone elses. i found that the best advice was the example that others had set — not their words, but their actions. worrying is totally normal — remember, everything will always work out in the end and worrying about it isnt going to help. sorry, too much advice? no need to listen if you dont want. ? good luck – everything will be totally fine!!! ?
That’s got to be hard to have people always telling you how they think you should do things. But they are most likely just trying to help, so try to keep that in mind!
Listen lady… it’s okay to worry. That’s what Moms do. As for the hospital, I have those same type worries. Additionally, we’re having babies in cold/flu/RSV season. I fully plan to discuss with the nurses ahead of time that I may need them to be my “bad guy.” So that I don’t have to hurt feelings, etc., I’m going to use them to tell people that I need to rest, that the baby needs to go back to the nursery, etc. Not giving advice… ? … just telling you what I’m doing so I don’t have to make anyone mad. ?
People are WAY too free with their advice. When I was engaged it seemed like every doctor, nurse, co-worker, and grocery store clerk had marriage advice. I can’t imagine how bad it is when you’re pregnant!
Every Mom feels like you are about unsolicited advice….. thats one we all have to deal with, a ” suck it up” or blast them for feeling they needed to share with you :-). You are going to be a great Mom Jen, and yes parents do have differeneces on raising their children, this is an area of growth for you and Mr Awesome too. It will work out Jen, you have a great relationship, you both wanted to be parents and now you will be. Worry is something that will be with you for a very long time so try to not let it over whelm you. AS far as VISITORS go, ITs your room, its your body, if you are tired you let them( Family/ Nurse’s) know NO more visitors until you are up for it. I wish you peace my dear. Have you gone for a massage in awhile?, go for a pregnacy massage.
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