It has been 7 weeks since our little Christian blessed us with his presence, and thus far Captain Awesome has yet to change 1 diaper. Yes, you read that correctly…7 weeks and no poopy diapers for daddy. He always said that he didn’t want to change diapers, and I always told him that he HAD to change diapers, and low and behold I am a sucker and have yet to force him to do it. When anyone asks, The Captain likes to tell them that he prefers to keep his “assistant” role when it comes to diapering…and for now that role is perfectly fine with him. Well you know what? That may not be perfectly fine with me. Mommy needs more than an assistant!
I will admit openly that The Captain is an amazing dad so far. He comes home from a long day aat work and will take the baby to give me a bit of a break. When the baby was fussy and gassy he researched ways to relieve his discomfort and sat on the floor doing bicycle kicks with his legs, and when the baby is fussy he will sit and spin this little bear mobile that Christian loves (You’d think it would spin on it’s own!). But with all of that came not one diaper change.
Here’s a story for you. One evening I asked The Captain to watch the baby for a bit while I took a shower. I was excited to relax and have a few moments to myself. After my shower I stepped out in my towel, and proceeded to dry off. That’s when I heard The Captain calling for me up the stairs. “We have a code 3” he yelled. I panicked for a second when I had no idea what a “code 3” was. I yelled “What’s a code three!?” He then proceeded to tell me the kid had pooped and peed and he got the diaper off and panicked. So I ran downstairs to see my poor son laying there diaperless. He was happy as can be, but daddy was not pleased with the dirty diaper. I changed the baby, showing the Captain each step I made. I guess I can give him some credit for giving it a try, but his follow through was lacking. Should he get an “A” for effort?
I am hoping that the “Assistant” will soon promote himself and take on a bigger diaper changing position. Mainly because someday I would like to leave the baby with his daddy and feel comfortable that he won’t be stuck sitting in a poopy diaper all day. I know that he’s a smart man and CAN change a diaper…we just have to get him to actually do it. It’s time for a promotion don’t you think?
Does your man change diapers? What role did your spouse take when it came to daddy duties of an infant?
Is that a typical guy thing? Pretend you just cannot do something efficiently so you aren’t asked to do it again?
He will step up I think. At some point you won’t be there or will choose not to do it. It’ll happen and then what choice will he have?
That is what I do!
Ummm…confession: I didn’t change a single diaper until we got home from the hospital! And not a single one with meconium in it…so what’s that? like 5 days?
I guess if it works for you guys, then it’s probably fine. But for us that just wouldn’t work. I would get bitter and probably all passive agressive. ? Luckily, my DH was thrilled to jump in and do everything for her. He would be the best SAHD and I’m the least domesticated person in America.
So my vote would be for you to just leave the house for 3 hours one day. Give him a bottle, stock him up on those diapers and go get yourself some coffee! Sink or swim, I guess!
Either way, wishing you well and I’m hoping you and Christian (and DH) are doing well!
I hadn’t changed diapers till I had our guy either! Definitely a learning experience.
Funny..i left the house the other day and thought that would be his chance and the kid slept the entire time and didn’t go to the bathroom! booo!
I know you are being jokey about this, but this makes me sad/angry. I would be furious if my husband was acting like this and absolutely demand we work as a team even on tasks we don’t like. I don’t know, it’s concerning to me that he won’t help, and I hope for you that you can have that conversation with him and really lay down what you need in terms of help. After all, it is both your son, and you shouldn’t need an assistant, you need a partner.
I’m sorry this may seem blunt, I just feel for you and want you know it is OK to demand more, because you and your baby are worth it. Also, I am only commenting because you are putting this issue out there, and I’m sure other readers are thinking the same thing when they read this. Good luck!
aww thanks for your support! It is frustrating but he’s such a good dad in every other way. I just love this blog to nit pick!
But he reads these comments too so it’s good to know people support ?
I hate to tell you this, but you may never see him change a diaper again as long as you are in the house to take care of it. I can count on 1 hand the number of times my husband has changed our daughters diaper in the past months. If it’s dirty he’ll just bring her to me and then be “busy” with other “more important” things. I know he can change a diaper though, because he does it if I’m not at home. Good luck!!
I agree…He needs to be thrown the wolves I think! I went out the other day thinking that would be the day..but the kid slept the entire time and didn’t go to the bathroom! booo! I thought that would be the day!
Wow, I can’t believe he hasn’t changed a diaper yet! I guess if he hasn’t spent a lot of time alone with the kid, because you’re a stay at home mom, that makes sense. I would definitely promote him ASAP!
I think alone time would be the best bet…it’s just been so cold here I don’t go anywhere! hahahha
My husband can get them off but he can’t get them back on. So I guess he can do the potty training! Great post!
hahhaa good to know I’m not alone!
My husband helps with the dirty diapers. With nursing full time I have no problem asking him to help. If that works for you guys than great. But for me I would become irritated if my husband didn’t help with the diapers.
I always thought I would be irritated, but sometimes its just as easy for me to just do it…help would be nice though. I’ll get him to do it
My dh is a great dad as well but he rarely changes diapers..We now have two kids (one in diapers) on the weekend he probably changes 2. It really doesn’t bother me…He is a super loving dad and husband. What more could I ask for? thecoolkidsblog.com
It’s true, he’s such a good dad in other ways…that’s the most important
that is pretty funny, I remember when we were puppy training and my husband had to clean the crate, can’t wait to see him react to the diapers.
My husband just jumped in. When we had our son, I was so uncomfortable changing a little boy my husband had to show me. How funny is that?! Just make your husband do it. Make the bath thing a ritual or go out until he has to do it. There is nothing like necessity to make a person adapt.
Adam changes every diaper he is home for. Since I am home all day with Jayden changing diapers, it’s only fair he does all the other ones. We do cloth diapers so he even rinses the dirty diapers off in the toilet. And he’s been really good about helping with the extra laundry.
If Adam can do cloth diapers, your husband can do easy disposable. It’s done in a matter of seconds. Just leave him to it and before you know it, it will be a regular routine thing he does. I think maybe he’s building it up to be a bigger thing than it is. ?