Do you remember the movie “a league of their own?” Remember when Tom Hanks says ” are you crying? Are you crying? There’s no crying in baseball!” Well that is exactly what you are supposed to think about when you read this title. Yes my dear friends I am bluntly telling you that as a mother I no longer have any time to wallow in self pity. Whether it be a hang over or I’m just plain tired or sick I still have to get up, take care of my son and be the best mom I can be…
I have now accepted that my party days are well behind me. I am at peace with that because I had MANY years to get it out of my system. Sometimes people don’t understand why I am happy to stay home on a Friday or Saturday night. But to me it is usually soooo not worth the crappy day that will follow. Even a couple drinks leaves me dragging in the morning. Christian is a good sleeper, but it always seems that he likes to wake bright and early on those nights I am up later than usual, and it’s pretty much a guarantee if I had too much to drink. I find myself cursing when he wakes up, and I then plop myself on the couch to turn on the TV. It’s only 6:30 am, and I am counting the hours till he goes to sleep. Now in my eyes that’s not fair to my son. He doesn’t know mommy is tired, and most importantly he doesn’t care.
The other week Christian got the stomach bug, and of course I in turn got it too. I thank my lucky stars that the throwing up began AFTER he went to sleep. I honestly don’t know what I would’ve done if he was awake and wanting to play while I felt sick. He luckily took 2 naps the next day and I napped too, but it’s certainly not like it used to be when I could wallow in front of the TV feeling sorry for myself. No way! Not anymore!
I think the hardest part is not being able to “catch up”. Before motherhood, if I had a long week, I knew that I could catch up on the weekends. Sleep in one day and all would be good. If I went out late one night, then I would sleep late then nap. All would be well. But that’s no longer the case, and I have a feeling it will never be again. There is no sleeping in. Even if The Captain gets up (which isn’t often) I hear them downstairs, or my head starts to spin on what I should be doing. Naps are a very rare thing, since the only time I have to get things done is when he is sleeping. No catch up for me!
It is a very long day when I am tired. Most of the time it’s just not worth it. I feel better about myself and life in general when I get a good nights sleep. Some people can live off very little sleep, but not this girl. My weekends on the couch nursing a hangover are long gone. Maybe I’m growing up, or maybe I’m just getting more sense, but I now know I hate to feel like crap. A glass or two of wine at dinner and early to bed makes for a perfect evening for me….Maybe I’m just getting old?