FINALLY!!! I feel like I have been blabbing on about wanting to go on a vacation for months, and finally the time has come that I get to go on one! For months and months while TTC I was holding off on booking a vacation for Captain Awesome and I to go on, because I was worried I’d be pregnant and feeling morning sickness, or the timing just didn’t work out. All the reasons pretty much sucked, but still, we didn’t book a trip. Once we found out I was pregnant we waited till we got the good news from the doctor that the pregnancy was progressing as planned. Then we booked it! Where are we going you ask?? Sarasota Florida!

June is a big month for me and The Captain. June 14th is our 2 year anniversary, and June 24th is my 30th birthday. So needless to say we have a lot to celebrate this month. When people asked me what I wanted to do for my 30th birthday I wasn’t sure. If I was pregnant a big birthday booze bash just didn’t seem to fit, and now that I really am pregnant….getting bombed in celebration REALLY doesn’t fit! So we decided instead of putting the money towards a party, we’d rather spend it by going away on a vacation together.

I always get these huge ideas in my head. Kind of like what we plan has to be so super special, that in the end nothing can compare to what I imagine. I hate that I do that. I knew that I didn’t want to go outside of the country. I was worried about drinking the water elsewhere, and I wanted to know if anything happened that I was in America and could get to a doctor. So that narrowed the field, but it also took away our usual favorites….Dominican, Mexico, and Jamaica. All inclusives are my absolute favorite, but we had to find something else. We came up with Hilton Head, but according to our Travel Agent it was going to be out of our budget for the accommodations we wanted. Then a friend of mine mentioned Long Boat Key Florida, so after speaking to the travel agent again we found a great deal in Sarasota Florida! Guess which hotel?? The Ritz Carlton! How fun is that? I don’t think I’ll ever again get to say I stayed at the Ritz!

So the trip is set, and we leave Saturday! We have so many great things to celebrate and I am so happy to celebrate them with my Captain Awesome! I hope Pooh Bear likes the sun!!! This body needs some color!!

If anyone is looking for a good Travel Agent I highly recommend Travel Tom! He works for American Express Travel and is the best travel agent I have ever worked with, and trust me, I am demanding and it takes a lot to make me happy when it comes to travel. Especially since most of the time I have NO idea where I want to go! He is amazing to work with. You can reach him at traveltom@gmail.com . Don’t worry, you don’t have to be from the area, I’ve never actually met him and we speak via phone and e mail.

Captain Awesome and I decided a little less than a year ago that we wanted to start a family. With just that one little statement so many other things got set into motion. We had plans. But now, looking back, the words of my doctor now come back to haunt me “when people plan God laughs”. Isn’t that the truth! The problem with plans is that they don’t always work out, and when they don’t work out you are left fumbling for a new plan. But through all the plans, and the ups and the downs, I have to remind myself to just live my life. You’d be surprised how hard that is!

When the summer clothes started to come on the racks last year I told myself “don’t buy any because soon you will be too fat to wear it”. I planned on being the “designated driver” at upcoming weddings because by then I was POSITIVE I’d be pregnant. Then came the miscarriage, and all the plans shattered. After we were free to try again, I was so sure that it would happen quickly. In September I had friends invite us on a vacation in January, and I said to The Captain… I don’t think we can book that trip now. I am hoping to be pregnant by then and I won’t know how I will feel. So we didn’t book the trip. Funny thing is that January came and went. Our friends went on that vacation, and we stayed home.

You may ask why I cared about booking the trip. Well , the answer is simple. It’s a lot of money to travel, and I am worried that if I travel with in my first trimester I could be sick. And therefore the trip is ruined because I am sick and can’t enjoy myself. I know what you are thinking…you could feel fine! And you are right, but it isn’t worth the risk. Therefore we decided we should plan a trip to coordinate with “the right time” and go to relax. But you’d be amazed at how life throws curve balls at you! Each “right time” has occurred when other plans have been set, and therefore we haven’t been able to take that trip. I don’t think people realize how small the window really is. And if you are busy during that window, you lose your chance.

I haven’t really bought new clothes for 4 full seasons now. Each one has come and gone with me thinking I’d be wasting my money. I guess The Captain is happy because it saved us a bunch of money!

My 30th birthday is coming up in June and people ask me what I am doing. But I can’t give them an answer. I’m not going to plan a raging drinking event if I am pregnant. That just wouldn’t fit. I would love to maybe combine my birthday and our 2 year anniversary (both in June), but I have to refer back to my previous statement…I just don’t know how I will feel at that point? What to do?

I realize as I am reading this back I sound a little crazy. Don’t worry I am not. Other than big travel plans I promise I really am living my day to day life to the fullest. But being the planner that I am I am having trouble with the unknown. So here is a reminder to myself and all of you. Don’t wish the year away, and don’t sit around and wait while life passes you by….remember to live.

You know how they tell you to be spontaneous before you have kids…and by spontaneous I am talking about travel. (get your head out of the gutter you dirty people you) Since last month was a bust, The Captain and I decided it might be nice to fly out for our favorite type of vacation…an all inclusive vacation!!! I knew it was a long shot, but for some reason I believed that a last minute vacation deal, was a last minute vacation deal no matter when it happened…but as it turns out Presidents week is an exception. Everyone pretty much laughed at me when I tried to book a trip within our budget…bummer! So we were left to come up with a Plan B….and if you know me you know that Plan B and Jen don’t always work well together. I get a plan in my head….and changing that is tough. I know I WANT to go away, but I don’t know where? So now, my spontaneous trip may not work out at all…Why? Because this girl has trouble being spontaneous.

You may ask why I am insisting on going next week for our vacation. Well if you know anything about TTC you know it’s all about timing…so you do the math. But all that aside I really do want to have a nice carefree vacation with my husband…but when you are an idealist like me, I worry so much about making the new plans that I wonder if the trip will be relaxing at all. Then I figure…we have to leave in a couple of days so I have to book the trip,  make plans to have someone care for the dog, be sad that I’m leaving the dog, pack both suitcases, and hope that everything else goes smoothly. I get that only a neurotic like me has all these thoughts going through their head. Most people would LOVE that their husband is willing to go away, and that you both have the time to go away, and even better you have the MONEY to go away….so what’s the issue? I ask myself the same question every day. The issue is me, and the issue is my stupid brain.

I wanted to go somewhere warm where I could get a tan, and drink pina coladas….but since that isn’t in the cards I am stuck as to where to go? (if I want to go anywhere else) The North East is cold (and I am so TIRED of the cold). We can drive. Which can be good, and Tinkerbell can come..but do I want to spend my vacation money that way? Most of Florida is cold, the Carolina’s are cold. I have no interest in visiting the Midwest right now. We talked about California, but that is a LONG trip for a couple of days. I went to www.vrbo.com (vacation rentals by owner) and thought maybe we could rent a house in Napa Valley…but that’s scary too. I have ZERO clue about where to stay in Napa. So how do you make the best choice on where to stay? But does it even matter? Isn’t the most important thing that I am going away with Captain Awesome? Some of my favorite memories are our vacations together. Why can’t I focus on that?

So there are my crazy and irrational thoughts. If there are any guys reading this you can use this as my admitting that I can be crazy and irrational like you think all women are. Will we go away next week?? I still have NO idea. But I guess if we do go I can call myself spontaneous right?? Or is the fact that I am writing this post and considering all possibilities make it not spontaneous?? Either way…I’ll keep you posted.