Today my son looked at me and said “you know what mommy?” I said “what sweetie” and he said “you are beautiful”. It was the sweetest thing. It’s not the first time he’s said it either. The other night it was the end of the day…I hadn’t showered and my hair was a mess. Then out of the blue he looks at me and says “mommy you look beautiful.”. I mean he looked me right in the eyes and said this and it melted my heart. Captain Awesome was there and kind of laughed (thanks dear husband!) but I smiled. Somehow, this little boy could say something so simple and sweet and make my day.
The thing is that he means it. Captain Awesome may think I am beautiful, but somehow knowing that to my son I am the ultimate female really is good for the soul. I know it won’t last forever. As a matter of fact I know my days are numbered! Soon he will see other girls and start thinking about them, but not now. Now, he looks beyond this tired, and overwhelmed mom and sees something totally different. What that thing is I can never truly tell, but it makes me want to be whoever it is he sees.
It’s hard to describe the twinkle in his eye when he says these things. His little boy honesty is refreshing. That is why I love being a mother. The other night he said “you are the best mommy in the world because you rode the ride with me at the festival”. He then threw his arms around my neck and gave me a kiss. It’s in those moments as a mom that we realize why we do it all. My kids have a way of doing the sweetest or the cutest things right when I am at my wits end. Bedtime is always my favorite because I am tired…and ready for the day to be over…but then I snuggle with my boy and we read and we talk and I wish at that moment I could squeeze him forever.
I know he won’t always feel this way about me. I wish I could bottle up 4 year old Christian and when times get tough and he begins to see his mom differently I could let little bits of him out. To remember. I am happy I write this stuff down so I never forget that little smile when he says his sweet things, and the twinkle in his eye. It is love at the purest form. That’s how I see my little four year old in these moments. It’s these times that we forget about all the other drama they create and know that they love their mom…and for that I will be forever grateful.