To the women out there who have a conversation with their spouse about having a baby, and then proceed to get pregnant very easily I applaud you. That is EXACTLY how things should go, but since life likes to laugh at us in so many ways, not everyone is that lucky. Although my experience isn’t the worst, not even close, I thought I would let you in on something they don’t always tell you.” They” being family and friends who keep hush hush about the “getting pregnant” experience. It’s not always the most easy thing to talk about which is why I thought I would let you know that if you already have a child at home….getting pregnant is a totally different story than it was the first time around. And to those of you who have more than one??? God bless you!
As you know we struggled a bit to get pregnant after our first miscarriage. But what I didn’t realize then was that even though schedules get tricky, I had a lot more free time. Once there is another child at home your “alone time” becomes very limited. If you are lucky you may have 3 days that you can ACTUALLY get pregnant. That’s being generous if you ask me. I would monitor and try to time everything as best I could but boy can a kid ruin that “mood” or “timing”.
Then let’s add the fact that I decided to see a fertility doctor. Before you decide to do so, please know that it can be very time consuming. I was extremely lucky that Captain Awesome was flexible and and was able to help me out when it was time to make my appointments, but it still wasn’t easy. Alot of tests HAVE to be done on certain days of your cycle. And if it doesn’t have to be on a certain day then you are forced to work with the doctors schedules. I can’t even tell you how many times I had to scramble to find child care, or how many times The Captain and others had to budge their schedules to help me out. I can’t say that it’s easier for someone who works outside of the home, but at least then you have set child care. I don’t. Also, this particular practice frowned upon children coming to the office. The reason? So many women couldn’t have children, and bringing one could be hard for them to bare. I get it…but it was hard.
Before deciding to see the fertility doctor my sister in law warned me that it was difficult. She told me that I should be prepared for what it takes to make that step. I am thankful that she was so honest. Even with that honesty I didn’t totally realize. So I wanted to tell you too. It’s a commitment. But in the end totally worth it because look where I am now!
Every struggle and hardship was worth it. I am thankful I made that step because I believe it got me to my goal faster. Would I have gotten pregnant on my own with out the hysteroscopy procedure that I had? I’m not so sure? I know when I am holding this baby in my arms that all will be well, and all the stress, and worry will just continue in another way. Isn’t that what being a parent is about?
So there you have it. It’s not easy….so good luck! I hope you are one of those that get to decide when you want a child. One of those who gets to plan it. Cause I truly wish that was the case for all.