Dear Hop Hop,
Woah little girl can you believe how far we’ve come?? As much as I feel you every day in my belly, and are getting our home prepared for your arrival I still find it totally surreal that soon you will be here. I walk past your room every day then sit in the glider and just look around. It’s a weird feeling. My head, my body, and my heart know the time is near, but to know that I will get to physically hold you in my arms and meet you soon feels a bit like a dream. But it’s not is it little one? In reality, at this point you could decide to come at any time and all I can do is wait….and waiting is what I will be doing. Patiently? Not so much…but I wait.
Did we tell you that you have a name? I have been waiting so long to give you a name and finally your daddy was ready to commit to one. Also, your little brother finally gave other opinions other than Poop. (You’re welcome!) I’m not going to lie, I may have coached him a bit but finally, out of the names we had him choose from he chose Tessa. That’s right little girl you are to be Tessa. If it’s up to your brother your full name will be Tessa Girl Girl Fly Away…..but to us you will be Tessa Lynn.
You have been stressing out your mommy a lot recently little one. A couple weeks ago I started feeling a lot of tightening and was very uncomfortable, and it happened a lot. I passed it off as just being pregnant, but in the back of my head I was concerned because I was in PA with your Jaju and Pee Pee and was worried about being far from the doctor. Not to mention your daddy was in San Francisco. So I cut my trip home and came home. Soon enough I decided it was time to call the doctor and was told they were contractions and I had to take it easy. That meant having to stay behind while the rest of the Rogdakis clan went to Mystic to celebrate your Nana and Papou’s 60th birthdays. I felt sad to be left out, but your safety and health were more important. So I followed the doctors orders and put my feet up!
35 weeks has always been a milestone in my head. I am so happy to be here because I have no idea what your plans are. I just hope that you stay in and cook for as long as you need to be healthy. I still am not feeling great and need to rest often. Your little brother keeps me busy and I need to remind myself to take it easy. I still feel the tightening and cramping, but at this point all I can do is wait for labor to begin. When that will be only you will know. I feel like a ticking time bomb just waiting to explode. I have a ways to go so I am trying not to expect it to happen soon, but because your brother was born at 38 weeks I still wonder if you will surprise us early also. The joke will be finding me at 40 weeks still waiting your arrival. I have a feeling that may be the case since you have kept me on my toes this entire pregnancy.
I have so much anxiety this time around. I know too much and it scares me. I worry about your big brother when I go into labor, I want all to be prepared for your arrival, I worry about what labor will be like this time around, I worry about your health, I worry about you turning breech, and I just feel worried. After talking to other moms I am told this is all normal. I am sure once you are here I will laugh at all my worry. Then again, as a mom I will worry about you for the rest of your days.
Your room is just about complete and ALL of your clothes are washed and put away. Due to some generous people your wardrobe is pretty much all set! Of course you deserve some new things, but to be honest I could not do wash for a long time and you’d have clean clothes for a while. Seeing all those little pink things makes me smile. Little girl clothes are just adorable!
Your daddy, your big brother and I can’t wait to meet you. I wish you could tell me when that would be, but it doesn’t work that way. We have come a long way little girl and are in the home stretch! Here we go!